66. Fourth Anniversary
Today, the 7th of April, marks my fourth anniversary of blogging as ‘Realistic Beginner’. For those who’ve recently started reading my blogs, I’ve had different kinds of blogging websites and many more blog posts before these 66 blog posts which I’d deleted for many reasons which I have mentioned in my previous blogs.
Blogging (or writing, in general) has truly been one constant thing in my life that has remained with me ever since I was a child. It’s my escape. I may not write regularly, I may not feel like writing on a few days but I always come back to it. It’s what that keeps me grounded. It’s what that helps me understand what I’m feeling and helps me put my feelings to words.
Most of you who read my blogs don’t know who I am and y’all know only what I tell you about me. But the funny thing is y’all know most about me than most of the people who know me in real life know about me. And I’d like to keep it that way.
This week, I’ve had a lot of time to think about what I am as an individual and how I would introduce myself to others. Please note: I don’t introduce myself to anyone. I just say my name and if it’s a professional setting I just say which department of which college I belong to and that’s about it.
So I’m going to write about what I think people should know about me.
I am a person who is very shy. I’m an introvert (been psychologically and empirically evaluated). I love writing and I’m an okay writer. I can study really well if I want to (key word being ‘if I want to’). I consciously try to speak about something only if I know something about it. I love solitude. I don’t speak to anyone about anything until I really know them. I love reading books, but I’m not really reading a lot. I love watching football and I can’t play football. I’m a bit of a geek. I am a composed and conserved person in most of the situations. A few of my friends who know me well have told me that I have an obsessive compulsive personality. I consciously make it an effort to be clean, do things the way I want it to be done, I make schedules and to-do lists, have planners and can’t function without them. I’m rigid, stubborn and inflexible with a lot of things and situation. I often neglect social relationships. I have a tendency to be controlling and I need to be in control of situations. I get anxious quite often. I love very few people and when I do, I make it my mission to make sure that they feel loved, given my fullest attention and make sure that they get the best because they deserve the best. I’m an ‘all or nothing’ girl. I play the violin (learning to, anyway). I love watching shows. I love dark comedy. I try to laugh and make others laugh because no one needs sadness all the time and should learn to be happy and get amused by little things. Sometimes I act dumb and allow other people to laugh at me, because in a way it helps me laugh at myself. I let go of a lot of things. But I sometimes cannot deal with criticisms and I cannot deal when people lie. I cannot deal with cheating and being disloyal to the person you’re committed with. I dislike it when people cannot be honest and truthful to themselves or others and live in a mode of denial. I’m all for constructive criticism and laughing at each other but I hate it when people put someone else down just for the heck of it. I do a lot of things my way and think quite different from most of the people I know. I’m all for loyalty. I’m all for consistency. I’m all for calmness.
That is all for today. Hope you all enjoyed my blog. Hope you all had a great Sunday. Hope you all have a great week ahead.